completion

Completion. Complete. Not everything is meant to last forever. Most beautiful things, you are lucky if they last a moment. Like a sunset, for example.

My mother attracted the worst type of men around her. It was often they were abusive. She always used to say “but you haven’t spent much time with them?“ So often it became laughable. I knew what she would say…

How long does it take to know someone is a monster btw?

How the moment splits apart, and fragments…you know those moments…so close to disaster.

Everything is peaceful, and then bam. Nothing is the same.

I was 15, by this lake, and one of my moms friends. First time I met dude. Unzips his pants. I just start laughing. I’m cracking up. This poor man, is like OMG. Scared shitless, “don’t tell anyone. They will put me jail…” I’m just thinking about my mom “she’s never going to believe this one. Five minutes. Five minutes!” Bro really

He starts to panic. I mean an actual panic attack.

I felt so bad. “calm down, calm down my friend. Breathe. No breathe deeper from your belly. Yeah. There you go. Its going to be ok. I’ll tell you what you keep that to yourself from now on and will forget this ever happened” I guess I didn’t forget though, until recently.

The guilt was buried there, so deep. Blocking me, now, from my dreams.

I see monsters now. I run.

Completion. Complete. The cycle is done.

You can’t recognize a lion, jump into its cage an expect it not to bite you. Doesn’t mean you are against lions, just not a fan of being mauled in the face. You know?

I deserve to be safe. Protected. Believed. It’s not another’s job anymore, I’m free. I am an adult. I am responsible for my safety.

Why do we hold onto the things that don’t belong? Why can’t we just let go to the people who treat us wrong. Maybe we are afraid of endings. But endings are intrinsically beginnings. A bit of a distance out sure.

When I was that little kid. I had no choice. We had no choice as kids how people treated us, but now we must take care to ensure that the people around us are not repeating cycles. And if they are what inside of us is attracting it. Is it just that we allow it?

This field is designed to help with completion. Of cycles. Of people. Of old paradigms. Of the need to hang on to things that don’t serve you. And to feel grateful to the people who inspired the movement. It will also help to cut cords, and release feelings. And to help you glean what this is teaching you, so life doesn’t have to go over it again

Take some time to celebrate. Dance. Buy yourself a birthday cake. If life was a game these situations, they are like boss levels. It may have taken you lifetimes to complete this one.